


The Adventure Begins

by pinkevilbob



Series: Pinkevilbob's Widojest Week [2]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition, F/M, they play dungeons and dragons, widojestweek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-24 14:39:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19725700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkevilbob/pseuds/pinkevilbob
Summary: Caleb's DM plans are upset by Jester, but maybe that's not such a bad thing.





	The Adventure Begins

**Author's Note:**

> So this is for the prompt Healing .This might be a bit loose of a use of the prompt, but eh.

Caleb had never really given the days of the week much thought. They would come and things would happen, so why have a favorite? None of them had ever stood out to him as special. At least, that was before he started dming for his friends. Now he had to say that Thursdays were the best day of the week.

The group had only been playing together for a couple of months, but Caleb was already finding himself getting really into it. Now most of his free time was spent imagining new scenarios for his players, The Strong. That night’s game was promising to be a good one.

The Strong had just finished their first dungeon and gathered the components the local shopkeep, Phillip, had requested. Now all that was left for them to do was return to the village and get their money.

“Fiona should be the one that gives Phillip the supplies,” Nott suggested. It tripped up Caleb at first that her wizard had his old name Bren, but he was getting used to it.

Fjord nodded his head. “Maybe she can get us a bonus.” His fighter, Captain Tusktooth, had already been banned from price negotiation after accidentally insulting Phillip’s mother.

“Just leave Traci out of it,” Beau said. “I don’t want to do an awkward flirting session with Caleb ever again.” Caleb had to agree with that.

“That sounds like a fine plan to me,” Caduceus said. He played the firbolg cleric, Caduceus. No one was certain if he really understood the point of dungeons and dragons.

“Does that sound good to you, Jester?” asked Yasha, aka Janet their gnome rogue.

Jester smiled. “Like you guys can keep Fiona away from Phillip.” Fiona being her human bard barbarian.

“Okay, you’ve successfully made it to the village. So, what are you guys going to do now?” Caleb asked.

“Well, Fiona’s going to go to Philip’s shop,” Jester said.

Fjord grabbed a handful of chips from the communal bowl in the middle of the table “We’ll wait outside.”

“Right, so Fiona goes into the shop,” Jester said. “Is Phillip there?”

“Behind the counter of the shop, you see the familiar sight of a pale red tiefling, Philip. He smiles as he sees you come in and goes ‘Miss Fancypants. You’ve returned. Were you successful?’” Caleb liked doing Phillip’s voice. It was softer than his own and was the first NPC that Caleb had a firm grasp of.

Jester nodded. “‘Yeah!’” She did the cutest voice for Fiona and Caleb couldn’t blame Phillip for being infatuated with the bardbarian. “Fiona pulls out everything that Phillip requested from her bag. ‘Here you go!’”

“Phillip’s smile grows wider. ‘You will never cease to impress me Miss Fancypants.’”

“‘Wait until I play for you sometime. I’m going to be performing at the inn tonight.’” Jester leaned forward with a big grin on her face.

Caleb pulled out some of his notes. “‘I look forward to.’” Everyone else at the table ooohed as Jester giggled. “‘Let me go get your payment.’ Phillip grabs his crutch and makes his way to the back and keeps talking to you. ‘I’ve heard there’s good work for folk like you up north in Bucher. Folks say that there’s a kobold colony that needs wiping out up there.’”

“How’s that spelled?” Beau asked.

“B-u-c-h-e-r,” Caleb said.

Jester frowned. “‘I think we were hoping to stay here a bit longer.’”

“‘There’s not much work for you here after this.’ Phillip returns to the front with a bag of coins. ‘Here you go 45 gold just like we agreed.’”

“Fiona smiles and takes the money. ‘We’ll miss this place’,” Jester said, bt she still seemed a little sad.

Caleb rolled a die. Seventeen. He rolled another die and added two to it. Eight. “‘Then you’ll need to come visit us sometime then.’ Suddenly a spear pushes through Phillip’s chest and he slumps over dead. On the other end of the spear is a gnoll.”

The whole table erupted into screams. “You can’t do that!You can’t just kill Phillip!” Nott yelled. Jester just sat there wide eyed in shock.

“Things don’t always go as you have planned.” Caleb had actually been planning for this attack since the start of the campaign. He hadn’t expected them to get so attached to Phillip, but that made the moment all the more poignant. “What does Fiona do Jester?”

Jester sat there quietly for a moment. There were a few different options. She could run out to the others to let them know what happened, attack the gnoll by herself, or scream to bring the other characters to her. “Fiona jumps over the counter, pulls the spear out of Phillip, grabs her healing potion, and pours it into Phillip’s mouth.” Or she could do that.

“But that’s your only healing potion,” Caleb pointed out. He didn’t mean to have her waste her items on an npc.

“Well, I don’t have any healing spells, so I’ll have to use the potion,” Jester said. The Strong were only level four and only had a couple of healing potions including the one Fiona used on Phillip.

Caleb scanned the table for complaints, but the rest of the players seemed okay with Jester’s decision. He rolled for the potion and added it to Phillips sheet. “Phillip gets back up and stares at you. Don’t forget that gnoll’s still there. Actually, it’s going to attack you now. Does a 19 hit?”

“Yeah, that definitely hits,” Jester said.

Caleb rolled again. “That’s 3 damage.”

Jester wrote down her new hp count. “Okay, so Fiona picks up Phillip and disengages from the gnoll to get them both out of there.”

“Picking up Phillip counts as an action. So if you want to disengage, you’ll have to leave him there,” Caleb pointed out.

“Right, so I pick up Phillip and leave triggering the gnoll’s reaction then.”

Caleb stared at her. Phillip was just an npc. He could understand getting hurt for another character, but not an npc. Npcs were disposable. “Does 14 hit?”

“Just barely misses,” Jester said. Relief filled Caleb. He would never forgive himself if he killed Fiona Fancypants. “Fiona carries Phillip out the store and yells ‘GNOLLS!!!’ for everyone to hear.”

“And that’s when gnolls start to swarm the village. Everyone roll for initiative,” Caleb said.

Jester bit her lip looking at her notes. “Wait, Fiona didn’t grab Phillip’s crutch and he has a bad leg. If I put him down, can he get to safety?”

“He can crawl,” Caleb said.

“Okay, then Fiona will just hold him until she can put him someplace safe.” Jester mimicked like she was holding someone in real life, and Caleb could feel a blush creeping up on his face.

“You’ll get disadvantage if you do that.”

Jester shrugged still holding an invisible Phillip in her arms. “Fiona can handle it.”

“Alright then. Okay initiative. Anyone get 20-25?”

* * *

Somehow the Strong managed to survive the encounter even with Fiona at disadvantage for most of the fight. Most of the group agreed that it was a fun game, but Beau did threaten Caleb if he tried to pull something like what he did to Phillip again. Jester was the last one to leave that night.

“I had a lot of fun,” Jester said. “Fiona got to save Phillip!”

Caleb smiled. “Have to admit that took me by surprise.”

Jester raised her eyebrows in confusion. “Why? Fiona adores Phillip. Besides I know that you like playing Phillip, and it’d be really sad if your character died so early in the game.”

“Oh, danke.”Caleb never really thought of it before, but if he had the option, it was Phillip that interacted with the party. It was also a lot of fun to have Phillip talk to Jester and flirt with her a little bit. Even if he wasn’t good at it. “But I’m the DM. My characters are just npcs and don’t matter much. They’re not that interesting of npcs anyways.”

“Don’t sell yourself so short Caleb,” Jester said with a hint of a pout. “Phillip’s part of why I come every week.”

A blush crept over Caleb’s face. “Really? Then I guess he better move to Bucher so you can keep seeing him.”

“That’s good cause Fiona would be heartbroken otherwise.” Jester grinned brightly, but then became more serious. “Caleb? Do you think that Phillip feels the same way about Fiona?”

“That would be meta knowledge.”

“Cay-leb,” Jester pouted. “I won’t cheat or anything. I just want to know for art purposes.”

Caleb could feel his heart beating hard as he thought about how Phillip felt about Fiona since it was the same way he felt about Jester. “I think he holds Fiona very dearly.”

Jester squealed. “But he doesn’t realize how Fiona feels about him yet does he?”

“He doesn’t believe that someone as amazing as Miss Fancypants could love a man like him.”

“He’s wrong you know. Fiona could love him real easily.” For once, Jester appeared to be one hundred percent serious.

“What about Captain Tusktooth?” Caleb asked.

Jester waved away the comment. “That’s just a fling. Besides, Fjord isn’t really interested in pc romance.”

“Ah. I’ll need to keep that in mind then.” Caleb closed his DM screen and set it on his books.

“You better. Fiona needs a whirlwind romance. I’ll see you later!”

Caleb watched her as she left and sighed. He knew that nothing could ever happen between him and Jester. But that’s what the fantasy of Dungeons and Dragons was for.

**Author's Note:**

> Phillip and Fiona Fancypants were created in the Widojest discord. We ship them so much.


End file.
